So.. This is what I have become.. Until today I then realised.

I have just realised,yes it's our experience who makes us what are we today. But the point is,what have I actually become.. I learnt to turn off my humanity switch. I learnt not to care. Seems like now,I learnt to care habitually,but not naturally,with my heart. With my love. Cause I am afraid. Yes. I am. I am afraid of loneliness. I care because I want them. Not that I love or care about them. But then.. Why do I tear? Because I used to care too much? But that's the period where I learnt not to care. Or that I cared too much that I didn't even realise I did the stuff and care I given to them?